Top Ten Signs You Might Be a Mummy

If…

Your day is over before it even begins.

You forget to order ice in your iced coffee.

You think a complete meal is two animal crackers and a sip of watered down grape juice.

You haven’t gone to the bathroom by yourself in over a year.

You have more peanut butter on your clothes than your toddler does.

You shave your armpits twice because you can’t remember if you already did it or not.

You can’t remember the last time you moisturized…anything!

You want to punch that no-good Caillou in the face.

You think sleeping until 7 is a luxury (or sleeping at all, for that matter!).

You would sell your soul (or maybe your children) for a glass of wine and a bubble bath.

truth