At one time I was a thirteen-year-old girl who defended the music she listened to by saying she didn’t even know what the lyrics were — that she liked it for the beat.

Ugh, I know this is going to come back to bite me in the ass.

I remember my mom taking away my Vanilla Ice tape (that’s right, cassette) because she didn’t like that he was talking about an 8-ball in one of his songs. An 8-ball…what the hell was that anyway? Something on a pool table, right? She should’ve been more concerned with one of his other songs where he was talking about having sex in the clouds or something. You’d think I’d remember the lyrics since my Bestie and I listened to it over and over writing them down in my unicorn-clad Trapper-Keeper.

Sometime later, my dad heard his baby girl and her same friend sing the word libido to Nirvana’s, “Smells Like Teen Spirit” before getting dropped off at a church function. I still remember him turning down the music inside our Ford Aerostar and asking if I knew what that word meant. Uh no, all I knew was that it rhymed with mosquito. Maybe that’s why Kurt Cobain wrote it? It’s so embarrassing to think of now — how my father must have felt hearing his little girl say something so crass. He was super old-fashioned, yet he always let me listen to whatever crap I wanted.

My Bestie and I are still great friends and often scoff at the garbage we used to listen to: Silk’s “Freak Me”, H-Town’s “Knockin’ Da Boots”, TLC’s “Red Light Special”…all totally inappropriate for young ladies.

These songs didn’t turn us into prostitutes or even make us promiscuous. However I see why our parents wouldn’t want us listening to them being young, impressionable minds and all.

Luckily, my friend and I went on to develop a healthy appreciation for real music…actual musicians who play actual instruments (although we still love to shake what our mama’s gave us).

So I guess when my daughter is blaring some song about Birthday Sex or S &M, I’ll have to think back to my days as a young lass who loved music solely because it made me want to dance. But if I see any booty shaking, I’m taking her iPod away.